Sometimes language cannot make it really clear what we are attempting to express. Let’s look at ”love”. Love can be felt for your spouse, your baby, your work, your morning tea, your favorite shotgun, your heavenly father, or your country.
To love God has little to do with loving your work. Loving your spouse is a totally different emotion from loving your new hunting rifle. We use the same word “love”, but its meaning changes based on the context. Love by itself has little meaning.
Let’s take a look at “touch”. You touch the touchpad of your notebook. This kind of touch is mechanical with no emotional component. You can physically touch another person. That could be anything from friendly to sensual to sexual to painful to lethal depending on the kind of touch.
A bodyworker can work on you with a clinical touch. Some massage therapists have the magic touch and can take you into a blissful state. A story or a movie can touch us intensely.
One word, but several meanings. Touch can be mechanical, sensual, loving, aggressive – without knowing the circumstances, touch has no clear meaning of its own. Our intentions give “touch” its meaning. When we touch objects, our intentions are clear. Where it gets confusing is once we touch humans.
When you touch your pets, they don’t think about it, they just enjoy it. They don’t care if you are male or female. They just enjoy it without any second thoughts. This also holds true for infants. They love being touched and cuddled. They also naturally touch each other without any reservation.
There was a study done with new born babies. The babies were divided into two groups. One was touched regularly and the other not at all. The study had to be aborted because the vital symptoms of the group of babies who were not touched began to deteriorate and the researchers were afraid that they would actually die.
Clearly babies and young children enjoy being touched. However at some point things change and suddenly a loving touch is not considered enjoyable anymore, but rather becomes embarrassing and awkward. Why and when do the rules change for touching? Clearly the children learn it from the adults, it is part of their ‘education’.
Now let’s enter the world of adults where we have to deal with intentions, fears, cultural and religious issues, judgments and interpretations. Hugs between men can be just a friendly form of greeting. But often the fear of homosexuality prevents men from touching each other.
Hugs between men and women can be a pleasant interaction or an inappropriate sexual advance. So when we hug people, we are entering the world of the mind. Cultures have their own particular rules regarding touch. Arab men kiss each other on the cheeks, whereas for American men this is not acceptable at all. Physical touch is normal in some cultures whereas it is totally avoided in others.
So what is the conclusion of all those ‘touch complications’? Most people love to be touched but are prevented from experiencing it due to cultural taboos, mind games, ill-intentioned people, shyness, or in some countries by the law. Massage therapy can be the perfect way to bypass all those cultural, moral or religious limitations and enjoy touch for what it can be – a deeply relaxing, healing and wonderfully pleasant experience.
sluuping